#awinewith Mel Grierson
MEET Mel Grierson, Founder of I Am Able
You can find them here:
Transcript
Danielle Lewis (00:00):
You are listening to Spark TV, where we bring you daily interviews with real women in business at all stages. I'm your host, Danielle Lewis, and I am so grateful to have you here. Amazing. Mel, welcome to Spark tv. I'm so excited to have you here.
Mel Grierson (00:18):
I'm excited to be here. Thank you for hanging out with me on this Friday night.
Danielle Lewis (00:23):
Oh my God, I could not think of anything better to do on a Friday night. I've got a wine and I'm on a potty recording with you. I'm going to chat biz chats with cool people. How good is this?
Mel Grierson (00:35):
It's exciting. It's exciting. I'm looking forward to seeing where our conversation goes.
Danielle Lewis (00:40):
Same here. So then let's kick things off by telling everyone who you are and what you do.
Mel Grierson (00:46):
Okay. So I am Mel Gruen. My business is I am able creatively connecting families, and it is all about finding innovative and meaningful ways for young families to connect basically. And so my main target group is from birth through to about five years. And the programs that I run, there's a bunch of them that come under that banner. So I do wiggle and giggle, which is for three to 5-year-old. It's a music and movement program. Mini wiggle. Yeah, mini wiggle, which is zero to two, similar thing, but it's a modified version for the littler ones. I instruct Baby massage group, so I'll have up to 10. Usually it's new moms, but dads and partners can come as well and teach them how to read their baby's cues, bond with Baby. And we do that over five weeks. And I also do some stuff in the perinatal sphere.
(01:49):
And my latest venture is really honing in on helping women to debrief a traumatic birth and give them the opportunity to share their story and have it validated. And on the side to those things, I use my time to create videos for Keyword Sign Australia. It's a language and speech support strategy, and I sing nursery rhymes and I keyword sign to those nursery rhymes as well. So I wear a lot of hats, wear so many hats. And you're also a mom? Oh, and I'm a mom and I'm a wife and a friend. Somehow we fit it all into the day somehow.
Danielle Lewis (02:31):
Oh my God. Well, I'm already blown away by how much you are achieving and accomplishing and the impact that you're having. But how did you even get into this? So I mean, I have a lot of moms in our women in business community, but some of the things that you talked about I've not actually heard before. So I've never heard of the baby massage stuff. Stuff I have only just become familiar with because I'm not a mom full disclosure to everyone's listening, but people sharing their birth stories. So I'm really interested in how this has all actually evolved for you.
Mel Grierson (03:13):
Yes. I would say that I came into business by accident, right? I wasn't going looking for it. So what happened was my background has always been working with people, particularly vulnerable groups. And so after uni I worked with young people under guardianship care, so part of our care system. Then after that I worked in school supporting families and kids, and then I stopped to have my own children. And when my eldest was about two and a half and my next one down was just a little baby and I knew I wasn't going back to my job at the school, I thought to myself, okay, what can I do with my kids? What can I do with a toddler and a baby at the same time? So I tried to Google all the things that I love doing with my kids at home, from music to the way we use our imaginations, just all the stuff.
(04:15):
And I couldn't find anything or anything like it out in the northern area of where we are in Adelaide. So I thought, okay, I'll create something. So I chipped away at this thing for a while and one day I just thought, you know what? I'm just going to put it out there and see if I can bring it to community. So nearby to where we live, the local library, lease a floor of a three story building. And I knew that there were free conference rooms and space upstairs, but I didn't know who to talk to about that. So I contacted the library to get the details of the people for the room upstairs. Of course, the library said, well, what do you need their contact details for? I said, oh, this program I've done, I would like to offer it for free to other families in community.
(05:03):
I just need a space to run it. They said, well, would you meet with us instead? I said, oh, okay. So I went along to this meeting and I showed them what I've been working on, and the next minute she goes to me, so do you have an A BN? I'm like, no. She's like, well, do you have a registered business name? I'm like, no, what would I need that for? And she's like, well, when can you start? I'm like, what are you talking about? And she's like, well, we would like to have you run that for us. You have identified a gap that we currently aren't meeting. And so I just said, well, I'll just do it. I just want to do it for free. And she said, if I tell my manager you want to do it for free, she'll laugh at me. So here you go, you invoice is what you think it's worth. And in my mind I'm going, what is going on? And the next thing you know, I'm looking up how to start small business, how do you get an A, B, N, all these things. And a few months later I ran my first program, but I've really identified that I'm very passionate about gap filling
(06:08):
And finding creative ways to meet the niches or the gaps that aren't being met. So from that, I was then asked if I'd run baby play groups and that really wasn't an interest area of mine, and there's a lot of baby playgroups out there, but then COVID hit. And so I still had this baby idea in my mind and we tried doing wig and giggle online. It's not the same engaging young children through a screen.
(06:31):
Oh my God, I imagine I hectic. We gave it a go, but it was not great. So that's when I was like, oh, if I do something, I want it to be intentional. And so that's what led me to the infant massage side of stuff. And so I studied that through 2020 and I really loved it and loved how it worked for all people from all walks of life and being this amazing tool that you can use to connect and doesn't cost people anything to do. So I loved that. And then I just thought that was great learning for myself. But then one of the local children's centers asked me if I would come and run it for them. So I said, okay, I will. And of course if you're well received somewhere, they all talk to each other. So then the next thing you know, I'm running these groups across children's centers in the northern suburbs and doing wig and giggle as well once we could be back more in action. And then from those massage groups identified that at least three out of every 10 moms in every group I was running, and when I was working a lot in a week, I could be seeing up to 60 to 71st time moms in a week from all different suburbs. Huge. It was crazy. And they'd all start to be reflecting on this birth experience that they've had. And at least three out of the 10 would say that it was traumatic.
(07:58):
And it's like coming to massage. They often come when babies are couple of months old already and the newborn fog has kind of slowed down and things that they've pushed aside, they just haven't had capacity for it. And now starting to come forward and they're going, I'm not actually okay with the way my birth happened, or it's really affecting the way I feel or my sleep or how I'm connecting with my child, and I just dunno what to do with it. And so I just kept seeing this all the time and just went, okay, what can we do to meet this? And that kind of then sent me on the journey of doing some perinatal wellbeing support groups where we get to voice the stuff that's hard from this big transition from not having a baby to having one.
(08:41):
And then really honing in on being able to support women and partners as well, because often they're there in the space when this stuff is going down and experience it in a different way. And so then that's when I diversified into that. So it's sort of as things have gone along and gaps have come up, I've gone, cool, I love that. What skills do I need? So I went and did extra training in my perinatal mental health studies, massage, all of that stuff. And I've kind of added on as I've gone as to what is relevant or needed to be able to do those things well, because when you're caring for people and their vulnerability, you want to look after them. Well. So it kind of went along like that. And the keyword sign stuff was during COVID. I had done some keyword sign training for myself before and I use it in my wiggle and giggle programs. And I just started making some little videos with my daughter who was two and a half at the time. And I posted one day and I wasn't a huge social media person, but it really went out and I got contacted by the head office in Melbourne saying they'd seen the video, would you create videos for our website? And they're a not-for-profit as well. And so I volunteer my time to do that, but I enjoy doing it and I'm passionate about it. So that's kind of the story of how it'll kind of weeped together.
Danielle Lewis (10:09):
Oh my
Mel Grierson (10:09):
God, last while.
Danielle Lewis (10:11):
But isn't it incredible how when you love what you do and you're passionate about the space and you just talk to your community and your customers and your people, that the next kind of move just sort of comes to light? It's not like you're sitting there with a blank whiteboard going, what's my next product? What's my next service? Like, push, push, push. It's all around service and listening to people and understanding what their challenges are and finding those gaps. I just think that's really clever of you.
Mel Grierson (10:44):
Oh, thank you. But you're right though, and I think that's what gives you the drive to keep going because it's not things where you've tried to impose yourself or go, maybe I should do this, but you're not hearing that from the community around you, or that's not what they need.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
But
Mel Grierson (11:02):
When there is a need there and going, okay, there's this need, what skills do I have or can I learn or can I find with others to meet that in a way that's not already being met?
Danielle Lewis (11:17):
Wow.
Mel Grierson (11:17):
Yeah,
Danielle Lewis (11:18):
No, it's incredible. And it's so interesting when I hear you talk about your business and your journey, you just seem so calm and so grounded, and perhaps that's why you're so amazing at what you do. But it does make me wonder, has this been how it's felt to you the whole way? Or have there been stressful and challenging times as you've grown the business?
Mel Grierson (11:47):
A hundred percent Danny. A hundred percent. I've come up against so different things. And I think the thing that I've learned is the further you go into business, it's almost like the more complicated it gets in a way. I think sometimes we think, oh, if I can grow it to this or I can make this amount of money or have this kind of impact, that somehow all the issues are going to go away. But if anything, it's like more is at stake and you've got it right, keep up with it. I would say I thought about this question, there's a lot of challenges I've come up against, but one, I think that was a big one for me was knowing when to say no and when to say yes. And in the beginning it was people saying, can you run this? And me going, okay, you tell me when you want me and I'll somehow make that work.
(12:38):
And I'm running around finding care for my kids here and rescheduling this here and there to go there and do it. And then them being able to reach a point where I go, okay, if I value what I do and it's needed, then it is okay to say, I can only offer this much at this time. I don't do this at this time, and that's actually okay. And I think also just knowing which challenges to take on and what not to, in the kind of work that I do in community stuff, there's a lot of opportunities and things that come up. And it's not that any of them are
Speaker 3 (13:16):
Bad,
Mel Grierson (13:18):
And that kind of makes it hard. They all sound good, and you'll have really encouraging friends or people that go, oh, you'd be really great at that. You should do it, you should do it. And they might not understand about running your own business and you think, yeah, there's nothing actually wrong with the thing and I could do it, but is it what I'm supposed to be doing now? And is that something that I should be saying yes to or that it's actually okay to go, I can't meet that need. Someone else might be able to or down the track, but it's okay to say no. So I think that's kind of been my biggest challenge and still is at times too. I have to really reconnect with the why of what I'm doing and what is my framework that I'm making my decisions on. And if what I've sort of projected for this year, if I come back to that framework and it doesn't align with what this year is going to look like, then I go, okay, say no. And that's okay. The world will go on. You're not here to save everyone, Mel. It's going to be okay.
Danielle Lewis (14:26):
Isn't it wild though? I completely agree with you. So I've been in business for, oh, I think I calculated over 14 years or something crazy. That's why my eye is twitching today. But I dunno if that ever goes away. I love what you said around how almost the further you get along in business, the more complex things become. Because I sometimes feel that as well. It's almost like you level up, so then your challenges level up and you do, I think it's almost a bit of a test of you as a business owner with, because also the more successful you get and the more people come to know what you do, they do come to you with those opportunities and oh, you would be amazing at this. And it's like, I would be amazing at that. However, that's not in alignment with my vision or that's not
Mel Grierson (15:20):
Quite
Danielle Lewis (15:20):
My customer that I want, or it's not the business model that I want. There's just so many different variations of things and decisions that you can make in business. I totally resonate with that thought of how do you create that framework of when to say yes and no. Yeah,
Mel Grierson (15:39):
And I think for me, for someone who's not running a business, I am my business at this point in time, and I've not, same girl, same. And I've not scaled beyond. And so I'm like, you're one person, Mel, and I love my work, but I don't want it to define who I am, and I still really love my family and my husband and my friends, and I can only give so much of myself in all of these different areas. And so therefore, sometimes something has to give because you can't be everything to everyone in this season anyway. It's always evolving. And maybe later in the year, something shifts or next year, you're like, you know what? We're going to focus on this. And I kind of keep that in the back of my mind too, when I feel a bit, oh, great, it's all or nothing. I've said no to that. That's close that door forever and don't catastrophize, Mel. It's going to be all right.
Danielle Lewis (16:40):
I know, isn't it? And it is. I love that you said that around seasons and saying, no doesn't actually mean it closes a door. Things do come and go. And it's not like when we say no to an opportunity, it's like, well, that was the only one. That was the only opportunity you were ever going to be presented with. So you ruined, ruined your life, ruined your business. So right. Things ebb and flow, and sometimes we have more capacity, sometimes we have less capacity. And that's actually what I love about running a business as well, is because we get to be in that driver's seat and kind of scale things up and down as it works for us and our families and our life and all of the things that we want to do and be known for and experience in our life.
Mel Grierson (17:27):
Yeah, absolutely. I agree with you. Oh,
Danielle Lewis (17:31):
I love that. I really, really love that. So when you tell your story, you often talk about things in terms of I was listening to this person, so that was the opportunity to go into this. Have you ever been conscious about growing the business? Have there been I guess what we would call sales and marketing activities to spread the word and get more people to know about your services?
Mel Grierson (17:57):
Yes. So for me, for example, I only joined Instagram a month ago. I proud of you. I'm so proud of you. Thank you. I've resisted for a long time. I think because I have this idea that people who use their businesses on Instagram live on their phones, the real big influencers. It's true. Yeah, okay, there go. You're not wrong. You're not wrong. But I was like, oh no, I, no, I don't want to do that. And so I was like, okay. But the thing is, for me, with moms, that's where they all are. And they'll ask at the end of a program, oh, are you on Instagram? And I'm like, okay, I need an effective way to communicate where I am, what I'm doing, because my program's changed location and time from term to term as well. So it keeps it all linked to your website, everything in one spot.
(18:40):
So I've done that. I've probably held off on growing myself or the business more because of the stage of life I've been in. So I have three beautiful children and my youngest is nearly two. And I've always managed, I've been very fortunate that when I've run programs and things, I've had friends that have been able to sort of be with my little ones while I duck off and do that program. It's quite bitsy being here and there. And so doing that and still being able to have time at home and work on the business, I've kind of not really pushed myself out there to get more until I've been ready for the step of going. I've maybe got an employee or a few to take on a little bit more for me. But that is definitely something that's actually been a big discussion for me. And my business mentor recently actually was this idea of do I need to step a bit more into operational versus being on the ground and running everything and that, starting small and scaling a little bit to what would it be like if someone else did this for you and you relinquish that control might be some other control freaks listening. I dunno, but I haven't, yeah, I'm just triggered over here. Yeah, control freak, right?
(20:06):
I suppose it is your brand, but it's relationships and people ask you to come, not just because they go, oh, you do baby massage, but they'll ask you to come because they go, we know
(20:19):
Who you are as a person, how you connect with parents, how you read a group, how you manage this coming up over here, but making this person feel seen and safe. It's all those little things. And so then as that person going, handing over the reins of something you've created and trusting them to do it, it's really big. And I'm having to work on that within myself at the moment because I know at the end of the day, taking on an employee or whatever that looks like is going to relinquishing some control. Even if they shadow you for a little bit and learn a bit of the ropes, at some point you're going to have to let them jump out the nest themselves and you're need to and back off and trust it. So that is a journey, that is a journey for me. But I think this is our last child. We're not having any more children. So my mind is now thinking more about where this goes and is it actually possible that you could have others help you do this work now? So there you go. That's where I'm sitting with that at the moment, Danny,
Danielle Lewis (21:20):
Oh my God, I just want it so much. And why I love it as well is because I feel like a decade ago, so when I first got into business, it was all about raise money, build a tech startup, hire lots of people, get a big fancy office, do all the things. And I did that and I was miserable. And now I don't do that. But that's also why I love talking to women in business like you and all the amazing women that we've had on Spark tv because everyone has a different story. Everyone has a business that they have created or designed around their life, and I love that about business. You choose whether you scale, whether you hire, whether you, oh, no, I do want to have another baby for the next 12 months. This is what we're doing. You are really in control of how big or small or expansive or impact, whatever it looks like for you. That is the exciting thing about business and how we can design it around our own lives. So I just love that you share that it is really a considered decision for you to create it so it works for your family now, but absolutely, what does the next phase look like? So yeah, it's just so exciting.
Mel Grierson (22:41):
Yeah, it's exciting. It's sometimes a bit scary. I also, part of my control Freakness is knowing what the next steps are and what the plan is going to be. And sometimes when I'm not quite sure the plan is, I feel a little bit, ooh, but it's okay. I am learning to ride with it more. And yeah, I'm growing. I'm growing.
Danielle Lewis (23:01):
Yeah, and I think it's also interesting too, I was having a conversation with another Spark member not so long ago around what do you actually doing in the business as well? What are the bits you like and what are the bits you hate? And maybe you can outsource more of the stuff you don't love, and that way you can kind of hold onto some of the things that you like as well. Someone once said to me, they're like, when I joined Spark, I didn't expect you to actually be the person hosting all the calls. And I'm like, that's the bit I like doing. I selfishly created Spark for me. I'm not getting rid of that stuff. So it is really interesting. Again, I think sometimes people think in business that you have to do it one way, but you get to choose. You get to choose what sits with it. I love
Mel Grierson (23:44):
That. And I think we sometimes forget we can make those decisions for ourselves too. It's like, well, you're in charge of your business. You can kind of do whatever it is you want to do. If you don't enjoy doing the marketing side and you want to pay someone to do it or even for a little while you can do that. You don't have to do it. You don't have to learn all the things. I know I've heard other women speak on this before around that as well, and that really resonates for me too. It's almost a reminder. You even saying that just now, I'm like, yes, that is so true. We don't have to, you could hand off the bitch you don't like to someone else who does or can do it well and save time. Right.
Danielle Lewis (24:28):
I love it. It's so true. And thinking about time and how we spend it, I'm also fascinated because obviously you're a mom, you have a family and you specialize in this space as well. So the business is obviously built around moms, parents, kids, all the things. Do you ever find balance? Do you take time out for yourself? Do you prioritize yourself? How do you do the juggle? How does it work?
Mel Grierson (24:57):
Oh, look, sometimes I've got all the balls in the air and I'm like, look at me.
Danielle Lewis (25:02):
Happy days.
Mel Grierson (25:02):
I'm doing this so well. And then other times it's like things are falling down everywhere. That's the honest truth of it. And I think in some ways I've learned certain ways of being able to juggle things well and other things. It's almost like when they're not going well, I'm reminded I probably need a better system or a way of doing that and then I forget about it until it comes up again.
(25:27):
But some of the things for me were the first time I decided to give myself a day off and I picked the day of the week that works best for the family. And so when people would ask to book in, I'd say, I'm not available on that day. And that was quite freeing and just knowing. But that's my day to be more available with my little one and taking the kids to school and doing those things. And when that time happens for me, often when the little one goes down for an nap, because the older tour at school, it is like get in there for that couple of hours that you get before the school pick up and jump on those emails or create some content or that's literally what it's like in and out, in and out. But I think lately my thing I've realized is even just making sure I eat, remembering to eat.
Danielle Lewis (26:24):
Yes, please. Yeah. Yes, it's important. The whole good that human body has to function thing.
Mel Grierson (26:30):
Yes, apparently we need food to function. So for me, sometimes it's just remembering, you know what, Mel, your little one's gone to bed. It's not going to ruin if you literally take 10 minutes right now and just eat an apple if that's all you want, and go outside and stand there for a minute with the sun on your face in your backyard, you're not having to go for a 10 K run. But the world will go on in that 10 minutes, which you probably would've spent bumbling about going, oh, what do I need to use it for? Something that's actually going to support you and what you do. Because if you are functioning well, then you're functioning well in your family, in your relationships, in your business. So I think that's probably the way it works for me is just having to give myself those little reminders and break down time that sometimes 10 minutes you think if you sit there and are told just the 10 minutes sit there, it feels like hours if someone tells you to do that. But for me, I'm like, even if I'm in my head about it, set a timer for 10 minutes, Mel, the timer will remind you you're not going to come off track and go and eat your apple. Go outside in the sun and you'll be better for it. So sometimes it's little reminders for me, but look, it still is still a juggle. The headspace I think of being a mom and running a business is quite, that was an explosion sound
(28:06):
For anyone who's running what that sound for anyone watching or listening side effects not my skillset.
Danielle Lewis (28:12):
It's so good though, because I think sometimes because a lot of women in business and moms, especially in business, are kind of the overachievers. We want to do everything and we want to do it perfectly. I think sometimes we think if we're not running a marathon, then oh, well, why bother if I haven't changed the world, run the marathon, done this. It's like, well, what's the point? It makes no impact. So I actually love that you said 10 minutes is actually great. If you can nourish yourself in whatever way that is in 10 minutes, it is actually so valuable. I know even for myself, obviously I'm complaining about my twitchy eye, but sometimes if I get that, I know that's me being overstimulated. Literally all I have to do is lie on my bed and close my eyes, and you were right. 10 minutes feels like an eternity, but it's this wild thing where you just give yourself that space and all of a sudden everything just calms down a little bit. Those micro moments are actually so powerful.
Mel Grierson (29:17):
Yeah, absolutely. I a hundred percent agree with you.
Danielle Lewis (29:22):
I love it so much. Oh my God, I could talk to you. I can have a wine with you all night. But I always love to wrap up these podcasts with one last piece of advice. So reflecting on your time in business, what would be a piece of advice that you would give to another woman on her business journey?
Mel Grierson (29:42):
Alright, my piece of advice, Danny, is give yourself permission to go up the mountain. And that is a figure of speech that somebody used with me. But what it means is give yourself permission to step out of your business, to work on your business.
(30:04):
It's really hard to work on it when you are in it all the time. And if you are the person that likes to dream and create and just keep those ideas happening, that's really hard to do when you're doing all the doing of the business. So my encouragement is give yourself a day and that can feel like, oh, I can't afford a day, but you can afford a day for me with small children, it's been saying to my husband, okay, this Saturday I'm going to give you the kids. I'm leaving the house. So leave your business space, go up the mountain. You don't actually have to go up the mountain, but that just means go somewhere away uninterrupted. Maybe you just want to go to the beach for the day. I know I have friends that have done this before where they've even treated themselves to a night in a hotel on their own just to go and be away from destruction.
(31:00):
But however that looks for you. I grew up on the river Murray, and sometimes when I go home, I'll take that time to go down and be by the river and take some time to reconnect with why are you doing this? What got you into doing what you're doing in the first place? What is it that drives you? Am I connecting with that in what I'm doing right now? And if I'm not, what can I change to find that reconnection and get a bit more balance, but give yourself permission to step out, go up the mountain, step out, and then come back down. And I really think you'll be better for it. Your whole head space, everything will be better for it.
Danielle Lewis (31:45):
Oh my God, Mel, you are absolutely incredible. Thank you so much. That was just such a gorgeous conversation and fantastic advice. So I'm so grateful that you spent your evening with us on the Spark TV podcast.
Mel Grierson (32:00):
It was my pleasure. Thank you, Danny.
Danielle Lewis (32:03):
That wraps another episode of Spark tv. Shout out to Spark TV sponsor IP Australia for their amazing support of the Spark Podcast and women in business. And if no one tells you today, you've got this.
✨ Thank you to IP Australia for supporting the SPARK podcast and women in business ✨
